to whom it may concern, hot tea vending machines. I repeat. HTVM. (part one)


this may/may not become a bigger story.

~

the night sky here was like nothing else she had seen.
Childish platitudes that roamed gleefully in her mind before torturing their next innocent victim, came screaming to a halt. their days were numbered.

Up there was nothing less than the blackest curtain she had ever seen…and egads, but were those bullet holes? mind bullet holes? but coming from which side?
the light they revealed was blinding.

she lay down in the grass, it seemed the only sensible thing to do.
She would have had a cup of tea if she could’ve.

It was a big deal, the day she realised she didn’t know anything.  That she could be so wrong about someone herself.

 

 

 

Part two is here

The very beginning Part A is here

 

 

65 thoughts on “to whom it may concern, hot tea vending machines. I repeat. HTVM. (part one)

    1. saynotoclowns says:

      But we know everything when we are young, right? lol oh gosh.
      I guess this could be about the shock of adulthood…the older you get the less you know…
      Self awareness can be brutal. In a good way of course.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. saynotoclowns says:

      It was late, and a quick write and the sky thing was going to go somewhere else, then it went this way instead. I’m glad you saw that. I’ve been trying to record myself reading it, but now I’m not sure what I think about it. I might edit it. Or not. I was kind of laughing at the sorry state of human affairs by the end…

      Liked by 1 person

                  1. Silent Hour says:

                    I just heard it and liked it very much! Nothing to overthink about, you did great. There is always something special about listening to someone reading their own work.

                    BTW, great new photo!

                    Liked by 1 person

                    1. saynotoclowns says:

                      Basilike, thank you so much. You’ve made my day. Ugh, I am so shy about it but didn’t want it to be too big of a thing… too late lol.
                      I agree. And I would so love to hear you do one sometime 🙂 No pressure, I understand. Just a little encouragement hehe

                      Thank you! Ugh, hate selfies too, but I didn’t like my last one.

                      Liked by 1 person

  1. S_MW says:

    Wish I could offer guidance or something for whatever is making you question yourself!

    Love
    Your don’t-know-anythin’, tea drinkin’ sista ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. saynotoclowns says:

      Allane, you are so kind!
      I am okay…this was mostly a work of fiction based on a number of different things. I did actually have this moment last night when I remembered the first time I saw the night sky where we live. And the rest kind of appeared.
      But I definitely feel that there is so much I have been wrong about. That’s okay. I needed some lessons too.
      Thank you for your lovely comment! xo

      Liked by 1 person

    1. saynotoclowns says:

      Hey! You know, it probably is!
      Love the name. And your pic ❤
      (Can you please do me a favour and give your honest opinion on the audio…maybe in an email…I’m pretty shy about it 🙂 )
      I was actually pondering doing the same thing recently…I wasn’t thinking in the beginning how journal-like this can be, in an associative way (eg my posts haven’t necessarily been journalling, but trigger certain memories of that time, you know?) and there are some painful things I kind of want to put behind me etc. I cleaned out a lot of stuff last night, I’m not sure yet if I will actually start a whole new one.

      Like

  2. Watt says:

    I love this! I love your skill at reading too, it blesses the fantastic words to a whole new spirit. The poem itself was so cathartic. When I read stuff like this, I celebrate the mere fact that I can read. It’s a gift truly. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. saynotoclowns says:

      Thank you!! I really appreciate that.

      Thank you for the Jung compliment! 😲Haha I think that’s a Wow face.
      (On a side track, coincidentally, I read another reference to Jung recently that intrigued me, it was in the Aussie edition of the AA “bible” which I started reading because of someone close to me. In one of the early testimonies, an alcoholic had been to Jung for counselling, but it wasn’t until he started looking at it spiritually, that he was helped. Anyway, unrelated, but I found it fascinating 😊)

      Liked by 1 person

  3. MichelleMarie says:

    I really love your blog design. I also love the last two lines “It was a big deal when she realized she didn’t know anything.” I seem to always be in this state of discovery about not knowing what I thought I knew.” I love your accent as well!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. saynotoclowns says:

      I just noticed this comment was in my Spam folder for some reason, whereas the others weren’t…but WP has a way of baffling me!

      And thank you! I tend to mess with it quite a bit.
      haha I have a writing category “general bewilderment” as I am in that state most of the time 🙂
      And thanks again!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. MichelleMarie says:

        I know WP does that it baffles me too. My blog usually gets dropped from follows and I’m not sure why but it’s okay I don’t really do this for followers anyway. 🙂 The reason I started WP was to express a painful time in my life and it has since turned into almost like heart therapy sessions with the friends I have made here. I stay bewildered, waking up in a new world every day. I like it that way! 🙂 Have a great weekend 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

        1. saynotoclowns says:

          The whole follow thing is such a mystery to me, too! Plus, I feel that since they have teamed up with more google products for mail, etc, it seems more glitchy, imho.
          I agree, I am not here for followers either. I just enjoy having an outlet, and like you said, the talent and the people I have stumbled on to have been a wonderful surprise bonus. I wish I had more time for all the things I would love to read!

          haha yes! I try to look at it like that as well 🙂 sometimes a tad frustrating, but ignorance can be bliss as well! lol
          Thank you! You too!

          Liked by 1 person

          1. MichelleMarie says:

            I’m glad I’m not the only one who feels this way. Several people have said this about the union between google and WP. It only makes sense that would happen. I didn’t sign up to link my blog to it. I used to have a Goolge+ till google ended that in April. Now I think you have to pay for that email which is kinda silly since we already have way too many emails, well at least I do! 🙂

            Have a super weekend. Keep up that awesome writing 🙂

            Like

hi. friendly banter is always welcome.

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